Home About Wedding Links Contact

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

On Being a Wife.

Growing up, I wouldn't say that I was one of those girls that dreamed of being a bride. I never really imagined my wedding or my "Prince Charming." I was interested in a lot of things and hoped that I would find someone to share my life with, but I wouldn't say it permeated my everyday thoughts. 

So I did the normal things that kids and young adults do--I went to college, I traveled a little, I tried news things and met interesting and exciting people. After all of that, I got a job and settled into single life. I loved it and I really valued being independent, but along the way, something inside me started to change. 

Actually-- maybe nothing really changed--maybe certain things just became more obvious. I valued being independent, but I also felt myself starting to be somewhat predictable and at times, stuck in my ways. I liked things the way I liked them and I didn't like to change. It worked for me, but that's because it was just me. I started to realize that if I wanted to share my life with someone in any capacity, I probably needed to ease up in a few areas. I just didn't know how to do that...

Enter Dan--my husband. He is great--kind and thoughtful. Intelligent and caring. We get along great and genuinely enjoy each other's company. When we first started dating I was still working, but now, since we have been married, I am not. I go to school and do some contract work but nothing at all like my past work life. I love it-- it is really perfect for us. Dan's job can be really stressful and when we were both working, it seemed hard to have us both under stress and cranky at the end of the day. Now, just one of us has to be cranky. :) 

But remember all the other stuff? The single life, valuing my independence--this new life really tested all of that. Especially when I stopped working and didn't have an income. Please know that Dan would never let me want for anything, so it wasn't about that--it was about being the strong female that I had always been. I feared that was slipping away. 

I struggled with that--I thought a lot about going back to work. Not because I wanted to, but because I felt that I should. I felt like a weak female and I didn't like that. 

Then--one day, I realized that this is my job. It is my job to be a loving, caring wife to my husband. To relish this time I have at home--to make our house a welcoming and loving place. To make it a CLEAN place. To take pride in dinners and lunches and always having clean clothes. To know that on the weekends we can do exactly what we want to do. After all, Dan loves me unconditionally and goes off to work everyday--this should be easy for me. 

Everything doesn't always fall in to place though--sometimes we fall behind, we (mostly I) worry about money, but for right now, this works and I love it. Perhaps what is perfect is that if I decided tomorrow that I wanted to go back to work and spend all day there, Dan would be happy. If I stayed home for the rest of my life, Dan would be happy. Dan is a happy guy. He makes me happy and he makes me want to do things that I would have normally deemed boring or stifling. 

Don't get me wrong--I still have plenty of days where I do things for myself and "play," but I love this job I have inside my home. I love that it is stress free. No mad rushes out the door in the morning or weekends lost to housework. Maybe in a year, this won't work for us, or me, anymore. Maybe it all will change--and that will be okay. For now, this works. 

I used to think that being independent and strong meant not giving into a stereotype of "housewife." I think I was wrong about all of that--I think being independent means doing what it right for you, for your life and your family, despite what society might say. In fact, I think doing that takes more strength than any 9-5 could ever ask for. 

This Summer...

This summer has been a whirlwind. Starting with that glorious day in May. The 27th to be exact. I became a wife to my charming, kind and loving husband. We had a dream wedding. I loved every minute of it. I wasn't nervous at all--everything felt so right. Surrounded by family and close friends; sharing the most magical moment ever with my love. What could be better?

Immediately following the wedding, reception and brunch (the next morning) we jetted off to our amazing honeymoon in London and Paris! It was like our dream was on auto pilot. We fit right in with the Londoners--traveled everywhere on the Underground, had afternoon tea, saw all the sights and even caught a movie. We rented an apartment in the Chelsea neighborhood and fell in love with the area. We would highly recommend staying in Chelsea--the location was perfect and the area was filled with history, yet very modern. A perfect mix. 
At first, I was sad that the CCTV camera blocked my shot of Big Ben, but later I decided it was a good representation of the city. CCTV cameras are everywhere! I guess we became so used to seeing them that I didn't even notice it in this shot. 

The best thing about being in London this summer? The Queen's Jubilee! We had planned our trip perfectly--and really, we didn't even realize that the gravity of the festivities until we arrived. There were parades and parties in the street, cake baking contests and even a concert and fireworks show at Buckingham Palace--which we watched from our apartment window! It was truly unbelievable and something that I am pretty sure I won't ever be able to duplicate. This picture above is one of the street parties we attended--just outside Parliament. 
In the middle of our London adventures, we took a short hop over to Paris, where we spent 3 days eating crepes, walking around taking in the sights, seeing the Mona Lisa and going to Disneyland Paris! Yes--thats right--Euro Disney! A caveat--if you plan to visit anytime soon be prepared--the rides are like the US versions, but on roids. Very adult and sometimes, to me, scary. Worth a trip if you have a day to kill though. 

Once home, our travels continued. In July, we took a long weekend cruise to Mexico. This was very last minute and a screaming deal. It was our first cruise for both of us and it didn't disappoint. We ate pretty much 24/7 and lounged all day. The stop over in Mexico was just okay--not much to do, but we did disembark to get the whole experience. 

Then, in August came our long awaited DisneyWorld/ Star Wars Celebration trip to Florida. We had been planning this trip since the middle of 2012 and we were both very anxious to go. Dan because he loves all things Disney and Star Wars and me because I had never been to a Celebration or Disneyworld. 
I thought that DisneyWorld was pretty cool. It is actually 4 parks--The Magic Kingdom, Animal Kingdom, Epcot and Hollywood Studios--but most of you know that, I'm sure. I loved them all--Magic Kingdom being my favorite, but Animal Kingdom was a close second. Epcot's World Showcase was a nice change from the typical amusement park experience--and I ate more soft pretzels in "Germany" than I really care to say. 

After surviving the heat and humidity of DisneyWorld, we moved to downtown Orlando for Star Wars Celebration. It was indoors and my first time visiting, so I was pretty excited. We ended up spending a lot of time at the panel sessions, but we had our fair share of "floor time" too-- visiting vendor tables and getting autographs in the main convention center. I really had fun--I wasn't sure that I would fit in so well--I like Star Wars, but my husband REALLY likes Star Wars. He understands all the jokes, satire and can appreciate the collectibles much better than I can. Still, I loved it and most of all, I loved sharing this new experience together. 
See this incredible view? It was taken from the back steps of my Uncle and Aunt's home in Wisconsin! It is so beautiful. Shortly after our Florida trip we traveled to Wisconsin for my cousin's wedding, held in this very backyard. It was such a perfect setting and she was a beautiful bride. I was so happy to show Wisconsin to my husband and share this wonderful family event together. Congrats Amy and Jason!

Phew. That is just about it...almost. :) We have one last trip of the summer to visit my parents in California. We are so excited--this is probably our favorite place to visit. The town they live in so quaint and pretty--we have such lazy days there and at the beach, which is just a short 10 minute drive away. On this trip, we'll be doing some new things too--which we're excited about. Dinner at one of my parent's fav places in a town we've never visited and a cute stage show production near their home. It will be a great weekend!

I hope your summer was as exciting and fun as ours was. Make no mistake, we don't plan to have a summer like this one again soon--so we took full advantage now. As my sister says--YOLO! (you only live once)